Breakups, getting 'friendzoned', one-way romances, rejected loves and waking up from imaginary mutual love affairs can be the most tragic and painful part of your beating, feeling, and sensitive heart. It makes you feel like you’re Shakespeare, the most unloved drifting plankton, or a demented suicidal teen with nothing to look forward to in life. Sometimes it takes a long time to let go, forget, and recover from heartbreaks. We’re humans with emotions after all :)
As your #TitaOfManila who had suffered from crushes who do not know that I exist, #paasaLoves, and one-way romances that got me feeling emo and scarred for a short time, I made a list on how you can get first aid treatment from your heart tragedy:
1. Make a list of his flaws and a list on why you’ll never be a great pair.
It sounds evil but it helps. Sometimes the best way to recover is to believe and understand why you do not deserve each other.
2. Look for great distractions. Transform brokenness into inspiration.
Divert your heartbreaks into something more productive-- in the form of vying for the employee of the year award, crushes, books, movies, art, poetry, hobbies, workouts. Sometimes heartbreaks can turn into beautiful motivations in life.
3. Never blame yourself and do not over-analyze.
Do not pity yourself and be bitter. Do not get mad at yourself. Do not sulk with the useless “what if’s” and “what have I done wrong.” Be reminded that sometimes things aren’t just meant to be. Appreciate your happy moments and let go.
4. Drown yourself with good music.
Attend gigs and concerts. Play feel-good, relaxing, or angsty beats ‘coz music heals the soul.
5. Run and work out.
Turn your pain into muscle pain and sexy gain. Running and working out will help you release your sad thoughts, rage, and depression. The best part is that it will make you healthier, feel great, and look better.
6. Stop stalking.
You gotta stop stalking his Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat and other social media. Stop checking if he’s online or not. Stop following him for it will only bring you more memories. Remember: more memories = pain.
7. Pamper yourself.
Give yourself some self-love after being broken. Get a massage, buy dresses, color your hair, etc. Treat yourself and it will help you build your self-esteem back.
8. Try something new.
Get out of your comfort zone. Travel. Do something crazy. Sometimes experiencing new things will help you refresh your thoughts and find yourself.
9. Surround yourself with love.
Go out with your friends. Spend some time with your loved ones. Being with happy people will help you cheer up and be happy.
10. Cry buckets.
Do not avoid and bury your sadness. Crying will always be part of healing. Mourn the loss. Feel your feelings, no matter how brutal and depressing they are. Release your emotions until you’ve already run out of awful thoughts.
11. Do not replace a bad ending with a new one.
Jumping into a new relationship will never be a solution. Rebound relationships are awful and it will not help you move on. Do not hurry to find love right away. Find love at the right time with the right person.
12. Reflect and do a self-check.
Learn the WHYs, your mistakes, your stupidity, and lessons that will help you grow in the future. Learning will always help you accept things.
I know it’s hard to move on. But sometimes you need to let go and say “Screw these feelings. I need to move on with life.” Comfort your self that not all the good ones are here to stay. Embrace the fact that sometimes we just cross paths with persons who we eventually need to let go. It may be short-lived but at least you had great memories (except for your celebrity crushes and one-way romances hehehe).
Let go. Life goes on. Move forward and pick up the pieces.
Follow me @fartherfurther